ABOUT THOSE ISTANBUL RUMOURS

STATEMENT BY HEIDI SVENSON 23-6-14
 

Contrary to scurrilous rumours propagated by the canine who momentarily seized the NFB magazine email account (now restored and culprit dealt with by summary field court-martial), I can happily confirm that neither Persephone myself or any significant others have been in Istanbul recently. This means we do not need cash to fly home or anywhere else. Claims that we were brokering a deal in conjunction with another NFB Active Service Unit led by Agent Z to get access to ISIS funds at a secret meeting arranged just over the border in Syria are just that.  Untrue also–the idea we would associate with people who use Facebook/Twitter so much is risible. And we like their politics not one bit either.

Meanwhile, reports have reached us that the entire membership of Britain First were seen with Matthew Collins in a food shop in South London.  On investigation it was confirmed that three of the ten present were ordinary members of the public after kebabs.  Glad to clear that one up.

Meanwhile we are still working on NFB issue 11: on which subject if anybody does want to send us some cash (seriously) we promise to print in full colour if we get enough.  But we’ll print it anyway: patience readers, that is the key. Order a few back copies (see below).

Anyway, enough of these Byzantine matters: I’m off for some Pinot Grigio as I watch the dying embers of daylight sun twinkle over the DW stadium: or maybe not!  Break a leg. 

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